"Liturgical Song" Parodies: by Christopher J. Garton-Zavesky

I'm not Afraid....

You shall cross a barren desert,
caused by jingles such as this.
You shall wander far from safety,
singing "I am on my way".
you shall mangle words in "modern" tongues
and none shall understand.
You think you're replacing God. How sad!

I'm not afraid: your time won't last for always.
Come back to God,
and He will give you rest.

If you pass through raging tempers on the way,
you shall not frown.
If you walk away from ICEL's charms,
You SHALL NOT BE HARMED.
If you stand with God against the foe,
and death must be your call,
Know that He is with you,
through it all.

I'm not afraid: your time won't last for always.
Come back to God,
and He will give you rest.

Blessed are the poor,
for the Kingdom shall be theirs.
Blessed are those who've wept and mourned,
who've prayed "God's will be done."
And if wicked men at ICEL hate you
for your love of God,
Blessed, blessed are you.

Be not afraid: the end is close at hand.
Come back to God,
and He will give you rest.



On Eagles' Wings ...

Yoo hoo!, here in the shelter of the Lord,
we abide in His shelter for life.
Hear from the Lord, your refuge:
"In sin you should not trust"!

And He can raise you up on Eagles' wings,
He can keep you safe from harm,
make you soon shine like the Son,
but only if you're in His Hand.

The snare of the fowler can't catch a bird like you,
and famine can't bring you to heel:
if you know better than God,
what need have you of shield?

And He can raise you up on Eagles' wings,
He can keep you safe from harm,
make you soon shine like the Son,
but only if you're in His Hand.

You needle each and every little thing
which you see and you think has gone out.
Though thousands tried before you,
they erred and so do you!

And He can raise you up on Eagles' wings,
He can keep you safe from harm,
make you soon shine like the Son,
but only if you're in His Hand.

For to His angels (HIS angels don't you see?)
He's given the charge to call home
ungrateful souls,
so they bear you up.
Would you turn away their earnest plea?

And He can raise you up on Eagles' wings,
He can keep you safe from harm,
make you soon shine like the Son,
but only if you're in His Hand.



Sing to the Mountains

Sing to the Mountains, sing to the Sea
This is Our new Liturgy!
This is the day which We have made,
Why doesn't earth rejoice?

We will take thanks from you, My lord.
We are so great and strong:
We have saved your church from death,
We are the church, hear Our SONG:

Sing to the Mountains, sing to the Sea
This is Our new Liturgy!
This is the day which We have made,
Why doesn't earth rejoice?

Holy, Holy, Holy Cow!
Heaven and earth are full of Our Glory!!!

Sing to the Mountains, sing to the Sea
This is Our new Liturgy!
This is the day which We have made,
Why doesn't earth rejoice?

This is the day when the lord is made
modern and hip, up to date.
We have turned the church around:
each person now their own pope !

Sing to the Mountains, sing to the Sea
This is Our new Liturgy!
This is the day which We have made,
Why doesn't earth rejoice?



City of God

Awake from your slumber,
arise from your sleep:
we're shearing the plumper
of god's little sheep.
From people in darkness
we've hidden the "Light",
the "Truth" which can guide them
though dark is the night:

Let us build the city of Us,
so their fear be turned into prancing,
for our lord, our hand in his glove,
has freed the lambs, let them stray.

We are children of morning,
we are daughters, okay?
The One who has loved us
will do as we say.
The lord of all blindness
has called us to see
new light in His People
The Church newly Free.

Let us build the city of Us,
so their fear be turned into prancing,
for our lord, our hand in his glove,
has freed the lambs, let them stray.

Got the lite? In Us there is no darkness.
Let us walk in our light, the children of new birth...
O comfort the people;
make gentle god's words.
Proclaim to our city
the day of her birth.

Let us build the city of Us,
so their fear be turned into prancing,
for our lord, our hand in his glove,
has freed the lambs, let them stray.

O City of Gladness,
O Vatican Two,
Proclaim our New Tidings,
OUR Church is brand new!

Let us build the CITY TO US,
so that fear is turned away prancing,
see: the lord, from heaven above,
has given us newly a WAY.



I have loved you with a narcissistic love

I have loved you with a narcissistic love,
I have seen you, and you are me.....
I have loved you with such narcissistic love,
We can worship, just you and me.

Seek the place of the Lord since he's been moved
if you find Him I'm not doing my job.

I have loved you with a narcissistic love,
I have seen you, and you are me.....
I have loved you with such narcissistic love,
We can worship, just you and me.

Seek the place of the Lord if you're so bored!
If you find Him I'll board up the door.

I have loved you with a narcissistic love,
I have seen you, and you are me.....
I have loved you with such narcissistic love,
We can worship, just you and me.

Seek in place of the Lord the people here
in the presence of "Voice of God" songs.

I have loved you with a narcissistic love,
I have seen you, and you are me.....
I have loved you with such narcissistic love,
We can worship, just you and me.

[Christopher J. Garton-Zavesky, 2002-2003. Published by permission of author. Mr. Garton-Zavesky is a parish choir master and music teacher in Louisville, KY. Gratias tibi ago!]