EF liturgical humor

My daughter is getting old enough to take an interest in following along in the Latin-English Missal of the Extraordinary Form (EF) liturgy. For years, she has heard us accompany the choir in singing the Ordinary parts of the Mass.

Those of you acquainted with the EF liturgy will know that the Mass is preceded, in the High Mass, by the Asperges Me, called the "Rite of Sprinkling" in the post-Vatican II Ordinary Form of the Mass.


The English translation of the Latin in the traditional form begins like this:

P. Thou shalt sprinkle me,
C. Lord, with hyssop and I shall be cleansed; thou shalt wash me, and I shall be made whiter than snow. [from Ps. 50/51] Have mercy on me, O. God, according to thy great mercy.

The Latin form reads as follows:

P. Asperges me
C. Domine, hyssopo, et mundabor: lavabis me, et super nivem dealbabor. Misere mei, Deus, secundum magnam misericordiam tuam.

Looking at the Latin form on the left page of the Missal, my daughter asked me an innocent question that made me both almost lose my composure and wonder whether Veggie Tales was such a good idea: "What does it mean," she asked, "when it says 'Asparagus me'?"

Don't you just love "teaching moments?" The hard part is trying to look serious.